perspective

I’ve been wrestling lately with what specifically I’d like to write/blog about. Have you ever had one of those seasons, days, weeks where there were so many things going on around you that you felt like you just needed to sit down and somehow try to capture those moments on paper or in your mind? This past week has been one of those for me…

Erwin McManus shares some great insight on times like this in his book, Chasing Daylight. He discusses how life is constantly in motion, made up the moments that come our way and what we do with those moments. For some, we love to take photographs, capture moments, relive experiences. However, photographs are simply still-shots of a life, an event in motion. And you can’t stay there…which for some of us is somewhat a depressing thought.

Yet, I truly believe there’s a deep need in our lives – not to relive moments, finding yourself stuck in your past – but to capture, to seize the full weight of moments that come along in our lives. Our word Moment comes from the Greek word atomos, which is also where we get our English words atom and atomic. The details and weight of moments. Think about that…

In Judges 6:14, God tells Gideon, Go in the strength that you have…and honestly, some days that’s all you can do, right? Lately, I’ve been struggling to find strength, to feel strong as a man, a husband, a father, a friend, a pastor. I’ve been crying out to God for strength, and most days just for sufficient strength for the day. During this time, I’ve kept this verse near me, daily, that reminds me where real, lasting strength comes from – Nehemiah 8:10: ...This is a sacred day…for the joy of the Lord is your strength. Joy. Strength. There’s a connection.

So, this week has been full of some rich moments for me, moments where had I not sat down for an hour or so a few mornings ago to write them down, would have easily passed through my memory. Moments which have contained so much atomic energy, that by capturing them, I suddenly feel new strength for the journey ahead.

I wanted to share just a few of these moments from my journal this week, joyous moments that have served to breathe fresh life into my heart…

…a smooth, better-than-expected transition for Molly, Julia and I last week as Molly returned to work and the great care that Julia has during the day with family and friends who are keeping her

…an unexpected financial gift this week that came at just the right time for us

…my mother-in-law returning home after fighting through some recent health difficulties

…the engagement of two of our good friends this past weekend, our privilege of being part of their lives and part of the event, and the honor of being asked to officiate their wedding at the end of the year

…conversations with students on the Guilford College Campus last week and new relationships God has given me there

…a conversation with my friend Kate – also at Guilford – and for a great new friendship with her

…time with my dad and my family last week

…an invitation to be trained this year in helping people discover their strengths and their true potential

…work of the Holy Spirit in our church community as we seem to be turning some corners and the hope of what’s ahead as we lean forward

When I look over these moments, it’s not that they’re much different than other moments we experience from any given week. The difference is perspective – how we’re seeing the things around us. One of the words I’d use to describe the Greek translation for Glory (doxa or dokeo) is perspective, or to think. And what I think is that life is filled with moments where we find strength – long-lasting strength or sufficient strength – when we discover the presence of God and the joy that awaits us in the moments of a day.

Pacifiers

Tuesday marked a first for me – the first full day I was responsible for Julia on my own. And I have to say I was pretty excited about the opportunity. Molly had jury-duty all day and had left me very clear and precise instructions on Julia’s daily routine, along with supplies for meals and tips on what to do just in case things happened to go ‘south’ on me. Not to ruin the ending, but we had a great day together with no major disasters to report of. The day was topped of with Julia looking at me with a big smile on her face just before she went to bed as if to say, “Thank you for taking care of me today, Daddy!”

Now, I’ll have to admit that one of the most difficult adjustments so far in parenting has had to do with the amount of ‘personal’ time I’ve had (or no longer have) in the course of a day…the consistency of my daily routine…time to do things that I want to do or things that need to be done. Sitting with Julia in the living-room mid-morning between a nap and lunch, I had a few different things going on: Julia wide-awake with me on her play mat, a variety of toys in the floor used to entertain her, and my laptop so that I could (of course) do some work in the process. Multitasking…you know…that thing that some of us pretend we’re so good at so for the purpose of getting more and more things accomplished in a day…

Anyway, during this particular sitting with Julia, I kept noticing that every time I’d turn my attention to the computer for a few moments, she’d begin to get a little fussy and whiney. (Don’t get me wrong here, it’s not like we sit in front of Julia all day trying to entertain her to keep her from crying…hopefully you know what I mean here...) So I did what I often do at such moments – I reached for the pacifier (which, by the way, is a proven life-saver and calming-tool we often turn to in the Shelton household). But after a few more minutes, Julia had spit ‘paci’ out of her mouth and was back to her wimpering. So I hit the save button, and returned my attention toward her. Immediately she’d start smiling and cooing again. Once I thought I had her calmed and in a better mood, I reached for ‘paci’ once again. Same result as before…crying and whining. I finally realized I had to close my laptop and focus on her for a little while. Multitasking wasn’t working here…and neither was ‘paci.’ I had to give her my full attention. What an inconvenience…

Hang on to that thought for a moment.

I’ve been thinking about this over the past couple of days and how I’m (and perhaps we’re…) so guilty of reaching for a pacifier to put in someone’s mouth when they bring their problems, cares, burdens and hurts to us…especially when they come at inconvenient moments in our lives. We’ve all had days when we’ve felt like I’ve got enough problems of my own, and the last thing I need is yours. Sound familiar? Perhaps you know what it’s like for someone to pacify you. Pacifiers come in a variety of different ways, don’t they: Oh, I’m really sorry to hear that. I’ll be thinking of you. I wish I could help, but… I’ll/We’ll be praying for you. Hmmm. Etc. And just like with children sometimes, we love to put ‘pacifiers’ in other’s mouths so that we can move on with our lives and focus on the things we want to/need to, rather than giving that person perhaps what they need most…our time, our focus, our hearts. How inconvenient…

Paul’s letter to the Galatians includes the words, Bear/Carry each other’s burdens, and as we do, we’re told that we’re actually fulfilling the law of Christ. Law? What law? Think back to Jesus’ words in John 13 where He says, A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you… When you think of Jesus’ life, it was filled with interruptions, inconvenient moments (like in Mark 6 when Jesus and the disciples are trying to get away to a quiet place…read the story in v.30-44 to see what happened)…moments where Jesus figuratively had to close the laptop and focus on the people who needed him. You don’t see Jesus using a pacifier with people so that He can move on with His business. He always has time, He always loves, and He encourages us into the same Way.

Consider your pacifiers today...